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A short lavatorial farce (in three acts)

Two Players: a parent, and child

Act I

First Player: “I intend to make use of the lavatory. Dost thou wish to make use of same, afore?”

Second Player (offstage): “No.”

Act II

(First Player embarks upon stated assignment.)


(Pause, sufficient for first Player to have gained admittance to lavatory and made necessary preparations for stated assignment.)

(Pause, sufficient for first Player to have partially achieved stated assignment.)

(Pause. [Brief.])

Second Player (offstage): “I need to do a poo!”